Thoughts on..... The Quarter-Life Crisis

This blog was written at the end of my 26th year, before I had my third son and started working toward my MS. It is dedicated to all of those living in the trying years that cap off the first quarter of life...

Did you know that I was President of my middle school? I also played the clarinet and flute, and I would sing for anyone that would listen. Ah, yes, back in the 8th grade I was ready to conquer the world. So of course a little girl like this would grow up to have a wonderful handsome husband (because my mother prayed for him), plenty of children (because that's what I really wanted), and a job as a cross between Oprah Winfrey and Mariah Carey (because that's who I was DESTINED to be).

Well...I got my handsome hubby, two kids so far (I think I'll be stopping at three), I've only worked behind the scenes of TV, and the thought of singing for people gives me an anxiety attack. Perhaps you're thinking that two out of the three (marriage, kids, job) 'aint bad, especially at age 26......So why do I feel like I fell behind somehow? Well... I'm not doing my pediatric residency like Chi-Chi, I never moved to New York City like Jaynelle, and about a third of my friends have their Master's degrees now.

Knowing that married women can NEVER really complain to their single friends (more on this in a future blog), and some married women act like they've reached the land of milk and honey and now they can die knowing that they're important or something because someone claimed they would love them forever...... I chose to focus on the positives in conversations with other twenty-something women. What I discovered when they began to share their problems, though, was SHOCKING! The women living the exciting life, wonder when they'll find prince charming and settle down......the married women with fabulous careers wonder when they'll have the time or energy to have babies .......and the women that somehow achieved all three by their mid-twenties, feel like having kids interferes with accomplishing a lot at work--and work is making them a terrible mother (and forget romance)!

This ladies and gents (I know you boys are reading) is what I like to refer to as the Quarter-Life Crisis.

Up until now, life has been very goal oriented. Step 1.....survive middle school. Step 2......graduate from high school. Step 3.....obtain your college degree. Step 4....... um....grad school? get a job? travel the world? marry? have kids? Who the heck knows??? No wonder we all feel lost. It's like we're somehow made to feel like we should have it all, and it should only have taken us those three to four years after college to get it. Who made up this rule???

Well....never being one to quite follow ALL the rules, I've made a decision. We are ONLY in our twenties! Who says we have to have it all figured out right now anyway? Not married yet? Well, many experts say that people should not get married until they are at least 30 because that's how long it takes to really know yourself. Not ready for kids? A first pregnancy isn't even considered late until age 35, and even after that many women go on to have healthy children. And my big-time career? I still have time to figure that out.......and wanna know a secret?......I wouldn't trade lives with Oprah or Mariah for all the money and fame in the world. Even they don't have all three and their Quarter-Life is a mere memory! (Anyway, I secretly love that my biggest fans show their admiration with big gummy smiles and drawings that have to be explained to me.)

After all, the Quarter-Life Crisis isn't really a crisis at all..... It's an opportunity to be thankful for the things we've accomplished, learn from the things we screwed up, and work towards getting wherever we want to be during our Mid-Life Crisis :).